Kanademase KURENAI BEAT!
The sound of Asianesque electro pounded through Hong Kong’s room as he played with the turntables, head bobbing. He had taken time off to play with his brand new DJ set and was really having fun blasting the sound of Asiabeat through the entire second floor of the house.
The best part was, unless by some very tiny chance he was in a big enough bad mood to flip out on him, Hong Kong didn’t have to listen to China.
However, Hong Kong’s private rave session was interrupted with the loud THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP of shoes stomping down the hall.
Korea burst into the room, almost making the door fly off its hinges. “HONG KONG! WE HAVE A DESPERATE SITUATION, DA ZE!!”
Hong Kong took off his headphones. “What now? Like, can’t you see I’m busy?”
“Nonsense, da ze!” Korea said insistently, grabbing the front of Hong Kong’s shirt and rapidly shaking him. “England tricked me into tasting some of his food and now I only have 24 hours to live! THAT IS A BAD, BAD THING, DA ZE!!”
Hong Kong felt like the world was spinning for a moment as Korea roughly dropped him on the ground. “What...are you...talking about...Yong Soo?” he droned.
“I’m DYING, da ze!” Korea yelled, flailing his arms around. “You gotta help me, da ze! You’re my only hope!”
Once Hong Kong could see clearly, he gave Korea a blank look. “Don’t be stupid. We’re nations. Nations can’t be killed off by food.”
“But it’s England’s food, da ze,” said Korea. “England’s food can kill anything!”
Hong Kong felt his lips twitch. “Uh...then how do you explain my, like, fifty years of eating the food he cooked?”
Korea fell silent for a second, taken by the argument. Then he insisted, “But you’re used to it! I’ve never had English food in my life! It could kill me!”
What a dork. Hong Kong rolled his eyes. Well...if Korea was going to stick to this belief all day, he might as well play along. “OK, fine. What do you wanna do?”
Korea grinned. “This.” He pulled a scroll out of hammerspace and let it unroll to Hong Kong’s feet. “Behold South Korea’s bucket list, da ze! Bucket lists originated in Korea!”
Hong Kong had an uncharacteristically weirded-out expression on his face at the sight of the list. “Seriously? All this? Seriously?”
Korea, not detecting Hong Kong’s utter opposition, nodded proudly. “Yep! This all the stuff I want to do before I die, da ze! Of course, being semi-immortal means you can be lazy with this, but since I only have 24 hours left I might as well!”
Hong Kong’s eye twitched. “Uh...have you told China about this?”
Korea smiled slyly. “Nope.”
To Hong Kong’s utter confusion, the whole room darkened and a single spotlight shined on Korea, who was fake-sobbing into his sleeve. “I can’t do it, da ze! The news of my death...it would be so sudden! Aniki wouldn’t stand to lose me...like he lost his star-crossed lover Chun Li!” Korea theatrically struck a dramatic pose. “I could never remind aniki of such a horrible thing!”
Hong Kong turned off the invisible spotlight. “OK, one: Chun Li died from being shot in the chest with an arrow 3000 years ago, not because of English food. Two: we aren’t even supposed to mention her name in this house. Three: you’re not dying.”
“Says you, da ze!” Korea yelled, upset that his dramatic monologue had been ruined. “We are going to accomplish that bucket list whether you like it or not!”
Hong Kong crossed his arms. “And if I don’t?”
A sinister shadow passed over Korea’s face. “Or I’ll tell aniki that you watch Ni-hao KaiLan.”
Hong Kong visibly jolted. “OK, YOU TAKE THAT BACK!” he yelled, suddenly panicking. “AND I’M THE ONLY PERSON AROUND HERE THAT’S ALLOWED TO BLACKMAIL!”
“Shows what you know, da ze,” Korea said, an evil smirk on his face. “Blackmail originated in Korea.”
Hong Kong sighed. “Fine.”
“YES!” Korea cheered, jumping back into a happy demeanor. He picked up the list. “OK, the first item is…”
Hetalia!
“Cliff diving!”
Hong Kong looked over the very, very steep cliff to the teal water below. “Are you, like, sure about this?”
“When am I not sure?” Korea asked. The two were in Hawaii, standing at the top of a cliff in their swim trunks. While Korea was bouncing with excitement, Hong Kong was re-evaluating his life choices.
“Cliff diving. Very dangerous.” Korea whispered to himself, though Hong Kong could tell it was actually directed at him. “You first, Hong Kong!”
“Don’t you da--”
Korea randomly decided to push Hong Kong off the cliff.
And then jump after him.
“YONG SOO, I SWEAR I WILL KILL YOU.”
“CAN’T, I’M ALREADY DYING, DA ZE!”
“DON’T SAY IT LIKE THAT!!”
SPLASH.
Hong Kong fought up to the surface, his brown hair covering his eyes. He blew it away and glared at Korea, who had come up and spit the water out. “Wasn’t that fun?”
“T’was not,” Hong Kong grumbled in his British accent.
“Next item is…”
Hetalia!
“Take a selfie while hang-gliding over Rio!”
“How do you come up with this stuff?”
Korea was already in hang gliding gear, with Hong Kong next to him. “Are you ready?”
“To die? Then no,” said Hong Kong bluntly.
“Here we go! URI NARA MANSAE!”
Korea reared back and jumped off the cliff, making them soar into the sky. The scenery of the famous Rio floated underneath them. While Hong Kong did appreciate the view, he was more concerned about falling to his death.
“Quick, da ze! Get my cell phone!”
“What?!”
“Cell phone! Take selfie! Now!”
Hong Kong cautiously gave him the cell phone, praying.
Korea flipped open the phone and stuck his tongue out. “Cheese!”
“WATCH WHERE YOU’RE GOING!”
SMASH.
The two ended up diving too low and landed in a tree.
Hong Kong swung from the branches of a great pine, a very annoyed expression on his face.
Korea was swinging next to him. “Check it out! I got it!” The picture indeed showed Korea making the face as Hong Kong was shouting his warning in the background. “You look so funny, da ze!”
Hong Kong was only hoping he had dragon powers like China.
“OK, the next item is…”
Hetalia!
“...air boat across alligator-infested waters!”
“Are you kidding me?”
“Nope!” Korea said cheerfully. He waved to shore. “Thanks for the boat ride, Australia!”
“Have a good time, mates!” Australia called, waving them off.
Korea started the engine. “Uri nara mansae!”
Then they were off.
Hong Kong was struggling to keep a cool facade as they sped across the lake, and Korea’s near-manic laughter really wasn’t helping.
Hong Kong cautiously looked over the edge of the boat.
There was a deep green shape moving around the water.
Holy mother of fire, the dork wasn’t actually kidding.
That statement hit Hong Kong like a ton of bricks.
HE WASN’T ACTUALLY KIDDING.
“Hey, Hong Kong. How do I dock?”
Hong Kong could only say two words. “I’m dead.”
Luckily, Australia was nearby to save the two before Korea became an alligator snack.
Hetalia!
“Item #3: Ski the Alps in Austria!”
“You need professional help.”
The two were in ski gear at the very top of the Alps in Austria. Austria had only barely agreed to the idea, although in Hong Kong’s opinion he just happened to be in a good mood that morning.
“Are you ready, da ze?” Korea asked.
“Ready to murder you? Sure,” said Hong Kong in a very dead tone.
“Aw, don’t be stuffy, da ze. We’re doing this for me!”
Hong Kong was once again trying to channel dragon powers. Anything to beat Korea silly.
“Anyways, you first!” Korea once again pushed Hong Kong off.
Hong Kong desperately tried to steer, but skiing was one of the few things he had no idea how to do.
Especially when he was heading for a very thick tree.
CRASH.
Korea arrived two minutes later, actually knowing how to ski. “That was amaaaaaazing! Hong Kong, are you awake?”
Hetalia!
The next items on the list were less stupendous and stupid, but Hong Kong’s nerves were still frayed as they did them.
Item #4: Get a cream pie in the face.
“Are you sure?”
“Do it!” Korea said, bracing himself. “Ready for anything, da ze!”
Hong Kong couldn’t resist this one. With as much force as he could muster, he crammed the creamy pastry into Korea’s face.
“Uri nara mansae!
Item#8: Record your own album.
“OK, we’re on air,” said Hong Kong boredly.
“Sore wa abunai zo, abunai zo! Bokura wa ue kara to hashiridashita~ minna wa tomete odoro machi! Isshou ni asobimashou!”
Item #15: Climb the Statue of Liberty.
Hong Kong couldn’t describe the utter weirdness of watching Korea literally sit on Liberty’s crown and scream “uri nara mansae”. With America joining him.
Item #28: Drive a motorcycle.
Hong Kong watched Korea zip around the place randomly in the motorcycle borrowed from Prussia.
“This...is...the...best...thing...ever...da...ze!” Korea yelled as he jerked here and there.
“Watch it before you…” SMASH. “...crash.”
Item #34: Ride on a sleigh.
“Thank you, Finland! Merry early Christmas, da ze!”
“No problem, guys!”
Item #47: Solve a Rubik’s cube.
“I bet you can’t solve it.” Hong Kong lazily tossed the cube to Korea, who caught it and immediately started solving it.
It was only ten minutes before Korea said, “Done!”
“HOW THE…”
Item #56: Drink a $1000 bottle of champagne.
Glug glug glug.
“I’m not paying for that.”
“I know you’re not, da ze. France is paying for it.” Glug glug glug.
“Plus, you know you’re not supposed to just drink it out of the bottle.”
Item #70: Go fishing. Awesomely.
“OK, do it.”
“Whatever you say,” said Hong Kong. He pulled a stick of dynamite out of his pocket and lit it, before tossing it as far into the water as possible.
The two waited for a few minutes.
KABOOM.
The water exploded, sending dead fish every which-way. One of which landed right in Korea’s arms.
He grinned. “#70 is complete, da ze!”
Hetalia!
“Thank God it’s over.”
Korea looked somewhat somber as he retreated to his room.
“Hey, aren’t you happy?” Hong Kong asked, arching a brow. “We finished the list.”
“Yeah, but I’m about to die any minute now,” said Korea. “My 24 hours has been reduced to 12 minutes.” He turned to Hong Kong. “Thank you for being my best friend, da ze. I will never forget you.” With that, he went upstairs.
Hong Kong was still incredulous, but a small nagging feeling of regret gnawed at him. What if Korea hadn’t been delusional?
“Hi, aru!” China greeted cheerfully, breaking the silence. “Where have you been? You’re a mess, aru.”
“Korea just finished his bucket list,” Hong Kong replied. “He ate England’s food and is convinced he’s dying.”
China blinked, then burst out laughing. “Are you kidding, aru? Even Korea isn’t that delusional, aru. Really, what happened, aru?”
“I’m not kidding. He thinks he’s really dying. And according to the clock,” Hong Kong looked at the clock over the TV, “He only has 10 seconds left.”
“Let’s see how this goes, aru.”
9…
8…
7…
6…
Hong Kong did have a small hope Korea was just being delusional.
5…
China cracked a small smirk.
4…
Hong Kong sighed.
3…
2…
1…
0.
Silence.
…
…
“Uh…”
THUMP THUMP THUMP CRASH. “GUYS GUYS GUYS I’M NOT DEAD AFTER ALL!”
“I knew it.”
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